Monday, October 24, 2005

The Unattainable

Today's quote: The truth is I gave my heart away a long time ago, my whole heart, and I never really got it back.

I was speaking to my sister on the phone today. She told me that she saw this movie that totally depressed her and made her cry, but that it was really good. She wouldn't tell me what it was, because she didn't want me to go watch it and get the same way. As soon as she said "good, but depressing" the first movie that came to mind was The Notebook. I asked her if that was it, and I was right.

Then we got into this whole discussion about how movies like that are so depressing and yet so good because they portray something that we all wish we could find for ourselves. We of today, so cynical and so jaded, nevertheless hope in the deepest of our hearts that sometimes the movies could be true, that some of us could be that lucky and get that happy ending after all. The truth is, we want to think that we could come to mean so much to someone else, that we could be that special. Of course we scoff at those brave enough to admit that in public, but isn't the real reason why these chick flicks make so much money is because we want to get away from the daily humdrum of our boring and unromantic lives?

Obviously, the take from the male sentiment is different. Many think that these ideas of love and relationships plant notions in our heads that make us yearn for the unattainable. Is it really unattainable? Or is it often used as an excuse for being lazy? I don't think it takes too much work to try to infuse a little romance into a relationship to make the girl feel special. And if the guy feels that the girl isn't that special to begin with, then perhaps he shouldn't be with her.

Monday, October 17, 2005

Most Influential Person?

Today's quote: Life is not the amount of breaths you take, it's the moments that take your breath away.

I was filling out a personality profile with my sister on the internet, and she came across this question: Other than your parents, who is the most influential person in your life, and why? This question only drew blank stares from both me and my sis. Neither of us knew what to put for it.

It's one of those irritating questions that keeps popping up over and over again. I am pretty sure I encountered it as a personal statement question when applying to college, and then again to law school, and I know L ran across it also when applying to grad school. Who comes up with these stupid questions? This question was even worse because it ruled out the most common option of choosing either your mom or your dad.

I know people think that adding these types of questions to applications help to round out their image of the applicant, and also gives the applicant a chance to distinguish themselves from all the others. However, why can't they come up with better questions? You see these dumb questions when applying to jobs, schools, hell, you even see them in the Miss America beauty pageant.

Friday, October 14, 2005

Just Another Statistic

Today's quote: Dismiss your vows, your feigned tears, your flattery;
For where a heart is hard they make no battery.

I was reading a novel during one of my "on" times. You know how it is, you squeeze in some other types of reading when you can, just to be able to say that you do read stuff outside of school. At least, I do. Anyway, the novel was fiction, but it quoted some statistics that made me wonder. It said that the US has about 4% of the world population (back around 1990), about 18% of the global wealth, but produces 50% of the lawyers in the world. That made my jaw drop. I always knew that the number of people graduating from law school every year was high, but I had no idea. I have no way of verifying that figure, but I can only guess that it's probably true, especially given the recent turn of the economy in the last few years. I remember picking up a Business Week two years ago, and it showed the percentage of applications to law school had increased by 36% from the previous year. The year before that, applications had risen by about 27%.

My father never wanted me to be a lawyer. I don't know if I really feel like joining an already glutted market and fighting over my own scraps to eke out a salary.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Rude awakening..

Today's quote: Well, how long is your program? Well, it was a million tiny little things that, when you added them all up, they meant we were supposed to be together... and I knew it. I knew it the very first time I touched her. It was like coming home, only to no home I'd ever known. I was just taking her hand to help her out of a car and I knew. It was like... magic.

I had the worst time waking up this morning. I woke up for a few minutes, and kind of drifted back to sleep. About 10 minutes later my mother calls and wakes me up. I was semi-concious, so I answered the phone pretty quickly since I hadn't fallen into a deep sleep. The thing is, every morning when I first start talking I sound like I'm croaking. Whoever gets to talk to me first has the benefit of hearing my lovely voice.

So this morning it was good ole mom. She wanted me to call Social Security and see about an application for dad, since he just turned 65. In mid-conversation the call dropped, so I called her back. Now, logical people would realize that if I didn't want to talk to her, I wouldn't have called back, right? However, the normal things like logic and reason just don't seem to apply to my parents, particularly not my mother. I called her back, and she starts going, whose phone dropped that call??? Did you hang up? I was like, I don't know, mom. Thing was, I happened to be yawning while I said that, since I had just kinda woken up. She knew I just woke up. For some crazy reason she starts flipping out and suddenly starts shrieking at me "What, you don't even want to do this for us, you worthless good-for-nothing daughter?!!!!!" And a bunch of other crap that a normal profanity filter would leave out. Then she hung up on me. I was left staring at my phone in utter bewilderment, going WTF.

I called dad back instead, and asked him if she'd lost all her marbles. The crazy thing was, she was still shrieking in the background. Finally my dad roars at her "WOMAN SHUT UP!!!!"

After all that it was great finding out that the government keeps raising the age for social security benefits, so my father doesn't actually qualify until he's 65.5 years old. And it was even better that they used up so many of my anytime minutes putting me on hold only to tell me that their computer systems are down and to call back tomorrow. They suck.

Saturday, October 08, 2005

The Devil Drink

Today's quote: I am a leaf on the wind. Watch how I soar.

Oh man. Ohhhh man. Remind me next time to keep my big mouth shut. I came up with the bright idea to play spades with four people, but not on teams. The premise was that every two hands we would tally up the score, and the biggest loser would have to take a shot. So before the game we went out to the liquor store and N decided that we should buy a drink called 99 Blackberries. I have never heard of this drink before, but I guess that's just me, because there is a whole line of this 99 stuff including 99 Bananas, 99 Apples, 99 Hot Damn, etc. The Hot Damn (cinnamon) was all out, so that's how we settled on 99 Blackberries. All of these are called 99 because that's what proof they are. So I foolishly agreed to this drink, thinking to myself, oh of course blackberries should taste great, right?

N decided that we should at least have some dinner before we got all f*cked up playing spades, so we all had some thai curry, which was fairly spicy. My brother decided we should take a test run of the 99 Blackberries, so he cracked the bottle and we all took a shot. OH MY GOD. That stuff was soooo nasty. It was like drinking super concentrated cherry cough syrup. It brought the proverbial tears to my eyes and hair on my chest and all that good stuff. As if that wasn't bad enough, my brother thought that it was so gross that he should mix it with Crown Royal. Then we tasted that, and that was even worse. It was a really nasty concoction of cough syrupy whiskeyish devil's brew. It was literally the nastiest alcohol I have ever had the bad luck to come across in my life.

By that point, we'd had curry for dinner, and also snacked on some beef jerky and guacamole Doritos. I totally ended up regretting eating all that stuff. Although I ultimately ended up with the highest score for the spades game, I did end up having to take one full shot of that nasty Crown Royal/99 Blackberries crap because one hand I had the lowest score. Altogether, I'd only had two shots, but my body decided it did not like it. I threw up 3 times that night. I can tell you that the green Doritos and the curry were not pretty coming back up. Everyone was making fun of me saying I was a cheap date, but really I'm not! Last year at the Halloween party I'd had several beers, about 4 shots, and then more beers, and I still didn't end up as messed up as last night. I blame it all on the 99 Blackberries devil drink.

To top it all off, I had the most vicious hangover I've ever had in my life. Actually, this is the only hangover I've ever had. I swore that I would never drink again. J doesn't believe me. He said that a law student saying that they're never drinking again is like a hooker saying she'll never have sex again.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Why certain memories?

Today's quote: I think she's the saddest girl to ever to hold a martini.

I often wonder why some memories linger with us longer than others. I have recollections of how certain people looked at particular moments, of being terrified during some events, of being advised of what to do or not do in certain cases. Do people really believe that you have to have the sour with the sweet in order to enjoy the sweet that much more? I don't think so. I believe that imagination could adequately supply what is needed in order to appreciate what you are lucky enough to have. Of course, I do believe that misfortune and suffering could build character, if the individual is so inclined to believe. Too bad we can't choose what we can remember.

My brother likes to recount to others often of an encounter that we had back when I was about 2 or 3. He was about 17, and I was being put to bed by my parents. I'd kissed everyone goodnight except for him. My mother asked me, "Aren't you going to kiss your oldest brother goodnight?" Apparently I replied, "NO." Then I turned around and flounced out of the room. Isn't it odd that my brother would hold on to such an weird memory? He likes to tell me often, "You were soooo cute back then! What happened?" Ugh. Brothers.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005


Today's quote: Do you remember what you told me once? That every passing minute is a another chance to turn it all around.

I had a really late night. I ended up going to see my brother at work, and watching some of the players. Then N and I went to a bar, and afterwards to a friend's house. It's funny how these dealers talk shop all the time. As if it's not enough that they work these crazy hours dealing poker all the time, on their off time they get together and talk more about poker, and if they're not talking about it with each other they're watching it on tv! And I thought law students were bad.

I'm wondering how far this poker fad will go. I've seen all these guys playing online at the law school, and almost all the guys I know play it now. All I can say is, it's not meant for everyone, and someone has to be the fish. Those people should keep their day jobs.