Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Rude awakening..

Today's quote: Well, how long is your program? Well, it was a million tiny little things that, when you added them all up, they meant we were supposed to be together... and I knew it. I knew it the very first time I touched her. It was like coming home, only to no home I'd ever known. I was just taking her hand to help her out of a car and I knew. It was like... magic.

I had the worst time waking up this morning. I woke up for a few minutes, and kind of drifted back to sleep. About 10 minutes later my mother calls and wakes me up. I was semi-concious, so I answered the phone pretty quickly since I hadn't fallen into a deep sleep. The thing is, every morning when I first start talking I sound like I'm croaking. Whoever gets to talk to me first has the benefit of hearing my lovely voice.

So this morning it was good ole mom. She wanted me to call Social Security and see about an application for dad, since he just turned 65. In mid-conversation the call dropped, so I called her back. Now, logical people would realize that if I didn't want to talk to her, I wouldn't have called back, right? However, the normal things like logic and reason just don't seem to apply to my parents, particularly not my mother. I called her back, and she starts going, whose phone dropped that call??? Did you hang up? I was like, I don't know, mom. Thing was, I happened to be yawning while I said that, since I had just kinda woken up. She knew I just woke up. For some crazy reason she starts flipping out and suddenly starts shrieking at me "What, you don't even want to do this for us, you worthless good-for-nothing daughter?!!!!!" And a bunch of other crap that a normal profanity filter would leave out. Then she hung up on me. I was left staring at my phone in utter bewilderment, going WTF.

I called dad back instead, and asked him if she'd lost all her marbles. The crazy thing was, she was still shrieking in the background. Finally my dad roars at her "WOMAN SHUT UP!!!!"

After all that it was great finding out that the government keeps raising the age for social security benefits, so my father doesn't actually qualify until he's 65.5 years old. And it was even better that they used up so many of my anytime minutes putting me on hold only to tell me that their computer systems are down and to call back tomorrow. They suck.