Friday, February 11, 2005

Russian Roulette

Today's quote: Ooh, great job man! I really thought you were retarded. I mean, you're better than that Corky kid and he's actually retarded. If there was a retarded Oscar you would win, hands down, kick his ass!

Do people go to class if they haven't read for it? I've already read from one of the blogs what happened when the teacher caught the person on such a day. Here's a question, why go to class if you haven't read? Isn't that like playing with fire? I know there's the whole concern over missing class, and no one else's notes are good enough...but still! Is it really worth it to go to class on a day when you haven't even read, and then get called on by a teacher who absolutely refuses to let go of you, like some kind of demented bulldog?

I could see how you'd risk it if it were a bigger class like torts or property, but in a smaller class like section? Um. I have to admit, there have been days when I hadn't read for property, and then I ended up scrunched down in my seat cowering, trying to pretend that I wasn't there like some kind of idiot, since my laptop is clearly visible on the table.

I guess it all depends on how scary the teacher is too. Here are the factors that matter the most if I'm considering skipping a class:

Risk-factor questionnaire:

1) Size of the class (are there over 50 people?)
2) How scary is the prof? How pissed would they be if you admitted you had not read?
3) Have you already been called on?
4) If you have been called on, did you do well? (if so, skip to question 6)
5) Have other people who didn't do well gotten called on again? (apparently some professors like to go back to the same people if they didn't do so well the first or second time.)
6) Does the professor just like picking on you?
7) Does the professor do rolling thunder, or select panels?
8) Are you wearing a suit to class? (professors love picking on those dressed up for interviews)
9) Is the professor the type to stick with a person who's not doing well, or drag the torture out no matter what? (for example, our property professor last semester)
10) Is this a class you could conceivably skip w/o feeling too badly over watching the tape from the safety of the lab or your home instead? (for example, civ pro)
11) Is your last name difficult to pronounce? I swear professors try to avoid those with hard names.
12) Do you already talk a lot in class? (really, are you a gunner? It seems like the professors have heard enough from these people, so tend not to call on them)
13) Does the professor call on people randomly from a deck of cards, or does he mark off on the seating chart as he goes? (eventually your number will be up then)
14) How far is into the semester and you still haven't been called on?
15) Does the professor take attendance? (if you miss class lots and the prof does take attendance, they tend to go after you the minute you do show your face again)

For next issue: the risk-factor range chart.


Anonymous said...

Garden States is one of my most favorite movies!!

Anonymous said...

You can always try the old deaf trick. Not all profs have those seating charts.
Unless you're a gunner there is no shame in cutting class. Do you really learn anything from listening to "MH" or whatever babble?

Witty and good taste in movies....nice.
-MN 3L Slacker

Anonymous said...
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Edward Jones said...

I was called on this morning by Stensvaag. I'd read but for some reason (could it be that the class was at EIGHT FUCKING A.M.?) I had forgotten to grab my books out of my locker. Fortunately, John-Mark doesn't stay on one person for too long so I wasn't made a fool of.

Anonymous said...

My guess is that you didn't read...
At least Hovenkamp is real nice and asks "have you gotten that far?" so hopefully if that ever happens to anyone, they can just say no.

Anonymous said...

after your first year, you can usually just say pass and the profs don't normally care. during your third year, they really don't care.

Arbusto said...

One of my professors told us this game they did when they were in law school. They called it "foxholing." Since he went to a big school the professors couldn't keep tabs on who actually showed up and only had a list of names. So when you got called on and didn't want to answer, you just sat there and looked dumb and would get passed over.

Another game they played was BINGO. Make your own BINGO card with students' names and when they get called on you fill in the spots. To win you have to get your row filled and then get called on and work "Bingo" into your answer. One way I used it in torts when I got "Bingo" was to say "I'm confused, do charities always have immunities? What if a charity decides to have a Bingo Night?" Victory was mine!

Anonymous said...

Another option if you actually DO feel guilty about missing the class (I usually don't...) is to find an empty seat to plop down in... when they call your name and realize you're not in your seating chart seat they think you're not there and voila! you're off the hook... I've never used this but its definitly in the arsenal for the day its necessary....

Anonymous said...

I've played Bingo before but it was with words that the gunners had to use and "um" was the middle square.
Another one was a gambling game and you had to pick your pony. If there are more than one gunner, you had to put your money on which gunner would talk the most that day.

hufflepuffer said...

Well I've thought about finding the some other empty seat to sit in instead of mine, but then realized what if they start calling on the people next to me and they're doing rolling thunder? Or what if they happen to call on the person whose seat I'm taking? Or if that person simply comes into class late? I've concluded the safest thing to do is to just not go to class, tell the professor I've been sick so please don't call on me, or sit on the floor and hide. Although my friends did threaten to call out to the professor that I was hiding...